It's hard to admit when you need help, especially if it means you have to ask someone for it! It's a pride thing that most adults can't seem to shake. Maybe it's because they think people think less of them for doing it, other's think it's going to make them look weak. None of these are even remotely true. Sometimes pride gets the best of us and we forget that people are there for you if you ask them... Even though you think they'll turn you down, you should feel better for trying. Keep at it.
Better said than done. I've been going through some really rough patches in my life as of late. And not your typical roughness, I'm talking middle of the road-pothole-dips and turns rough. Not a pretty sight if you think about it. Let's just say that the damage of my rough patch is over due for repairs and needs some "TLC" "ASAP"... Yes in "air" "quotes"... just looks fun to do...
Moving on... So this blog today isn't supposed to make anyone feel better, well sorta (me).. But maybe more of a "asking for guidance" if you will. I've tried making new friends that will keep me going (didn't happen). Instead i found people who were just as "messed" up as i am. Then i tried starting new things to keep me busy (not quite a fail but not a complete success either). Instead i got myself more stressful trying to please others and made me stray from the intended goal in the first place. Hence the reason i'm trying to write more, get more ideas about anything i'm interested in, (my at-home business[es], youtube, DIYing, baking recipes) and so far i have a lot ideas yet no where to begin!!!
I know what a lot of people are thinking... Why not ask family? Well for starters... it's complicated! Secondly, i lived with them for 18 years... not something you discuss with them, again... PRIDE!! and Third, well... to me i don't want them worring about me everytime i screw up or something happens to me. To put it simply, my family and i have a strange but somewhat simple relationship compared to others that i know of. I love my family deeply with all my heart, but there are times where certain parts of my life outside my family's home is private and dear to me as well as, again, not the type of things you bring up at dinner with your parents.
I've noticed over the years, while being married, and a now 2 yr old running around, it's a little more of what makes my little family happy than what makes me happy. It's your typical dilemma once you're "with child". Mind you i have been told priorities may change but always try to include "me time" in your daily routine or you'll convert yourself nuts * duly noted!!!!
Guess what i'm trying to say is that i am having a hard time reverting to my happiest times. Trying to find that happy medium between potty training and getting dressed up for a "date night" with my husband. Here's to hoping that February will bring happier moments of me!
-Tired out and pulling my hairs, still smiling!! Monique
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